Where do we go from here....

Listening to: The Scientist - Coldplay

Left the blog vacant for a bit..again. Sigh, I guess life really takes a toll on you. I guess I can't say I haven't had much time in front of the computer, but rather I've had plenty. I can't also say I've been busy with work because lately work has been treating me well. The only excuse I can put together is that I've been so utterly lazy. Then again who isn't.

I recently watched an episode of One Tree Hill..Yes, the show is still on for the eight season. Episode 8.08 kinda put this question to me, "What comes next?". And it seriously got me thinking..Shit, I don't have an answer to that.

I'm past being a teenager, I'm done with my studies, I've got a job..so what comes next? Where am I heading towards? Where do I see myself in the future? I guess it's not surprising that I don't have the answer to either one of these questions.

I've heard so many comments from friends, lamenting about how hard studying is, how stressful assignments can get, how exams are just about the worst thing one can go through..but I can't help but be envious. I might sound silly, but I like being a student. I like knowing that I've got time to figure things out. That I can work harder the next time, or do things differently every time I fail.

I guess when you're out there in the world, life hardly gives you second chances or perhaps 'trial rounds'. You are judged as soon as you make the tiniest of mistakes or if you don't perform up to the given standard. And somehow your failure will be what most will expect of you in the future. It's scary and nerve-recking all at the same time.

Same goes for relationships. At first everything looks hopeful, things are simple and uncomplicated but after awhile the honeymoon is over and the real relationship surfaces - the problems of dealing with one another, tolerating each others' wants and needs, coming to terms with decisions each one has made...coping with regrets and past actions. Before you know it your view of your partner changes and vice versa. At first you don't notice this but sooner or later, changes become evident. Suddenly you find yourself hating qualities you first fell in love with in that person. It's sad but so true.

So what comes next?
What comes next when you don't see a future?
What comes next if you've discovered the limit to your talent?
What comes next when you have to move on and let him go?
What comes next when relationships, when friendship isn't fulfilling?

What is your next move? I guess we fickle-minded, complicated mortals just have to move on. Pick ourselves up and just hope for the best. That what ever choice we should decide to make will eventually lead to a better, more secure outcome. That what ever relationships we let go of, will eventually lead to newer and closer ties with others. That what ever love we lose, we earn back..stronger and lasting. Well that's what I hope for as November comes to an end and I have one more month left before 2010 closes on me. And I hope for my sake, I find the answers to these questions...