Monash Music Festival

Finally, all the assignments to date are done (pheww...) and holidays have arrived!!!..Most would get a sense of relief but somehow I still feel uneasy, like I forgot something huge...(I hate feelings like that). I guess I just got to tell my mind to stop thinking and instead start relaxing..hehe.

So finally I had an opportunity to visit Monash. And yes, I have to admit..its way better than Taylors, Its so huge (lucky Monash ppl). Shaneil was performing at the Monash Music Festival, so we went there to support him and a few other bands..hehe.. I guess it gave us a nice break from the assignment stress , with all the screaming, the loud music and the good company(not to mention the water thrown at us!). Anyways do check this people out:

http://www.myspace.com/buscompanyband
http://www.myspace.com/darrenashley

Us with Crossing Boundaries

Bus Company Band!!!...wish I had more shots...hehe

Bus Company's drummer..really talented guy!

Shaneil in action!!!

Brian, Daren & James...all with funny expression..hehe
(I wonder what Daren was thinking about? lol)

Summer's Gone

It's getting late but I just refuse to call it a night. I'm listening to him and I cant help feel this deep melancholy that the music brings. Though his voice calmly enters my ears, but what it does to my heart makes me stop to think about all that has been happening. And in that second, all these questions enter my mind.

'Where are we going in life?', 'What is the meaning for all lifes' circumstances?', 'Why do I feel so numb?', 'How did it get so complicated?', 'Why cant I sleep?' and all this lead me to question God, WHY...I guess the worst thing is knowing that I dont have the answers for any of them.

Its one of those songs that make you wanna grab the closes pillow and hold on tight while you close your eyes and try to escape life for a second.

I guess music does this to me, and frankly I dont mind.

Summer's gone, Winters just too cold,
Memories are all that keep me warm,
Here I lay in my bed dont want to go out there...
'Summer's Gone'
http://www.myspace.com/darrenashley

The idea of goin up north...

College work is piling up, time seems to pass ever more quickly, and just when I think life cannot get anymore messier..dad says were going up north. Not that I didnt expect that one coming, seeing how recent events have unfold. I guess the family needed to go, no questions asked. So, we were all in the car for yet another grueling 5 hour drive.

Though the panic has somewhat subsided, my heart ached when i saw her. Its just so scary knowing that just last week things could have changed for the worst. It made me think about alot of things, some of which I fear to even mention.

In a way being here gives me a sense of calm reassurance, something that I really need through all the doubt and uncertainties going through my mind lately. Knowing that things are looking up gives my heart ease to travel home again and be miles away from her. It gives me a little hope as I bring this good news home with me.

A second changes everything...

When the unavoidable circumstance hits you right in the face, what do you say in return? What is your defense against this great darkness? Or does it leave you in silence, numb until it attacks again.

How do you stop the unavoidable from ever happening?? That question never fails to enter into my conciousness and sometimes haunt me in my sleep. Answering a phone call made me realise that it is inevitable. And though all I could say were one syllable replies, in my mind all I could think of was..."Please, God...please... I've lost count of the times I kept on repeating that in my mind (must have been almost a hundred times by now).

Through all this tension going on in my head, I somehow feel so helpless. What do I do..? Who do I talk to?..What would I say?..then I realise that I've been so self-centered. And somehow you come to mind. And I wonder how friendship became so complicated...especially in this time of need. I guess all I have left to do is trust in Him, my life is in His hands...

My Lenten Offering

Lately, things have been quite interesting(so it seems..hehe). And being that its the Lenten season, things have been extra interesting. Lent means alot to me, not because im a sunday school teacher and as one I have to portray a good example for the kids, but this time of the year is somewhat special.

Firstly, being that not everyone knows what is Lent makes it even precious to those who observe it. To us, Lent is a holy week to remember Christ's sufferings, His trials before His passion and much more. Every year, God gives us this opportunity to experience Christ's 40 days of temptation. And though we only carry the silver of His cross, its the least we can do.

So, this year being that it was Lent, I decided to spend this time wisely. I think God was being pretty humorous too, considering the challenges I had to face through lately. The times when I had to play dumb and act sane while "the world" would have another outburst on me, the trying times when I had to forgive and forget and then do it all over again. Thinking it over, a smile forms on my face, God is pretty humorous..(thx???)

Other than that, Im glad I got the chance to join the youths on their outreach events. It was a real eye-opener into a world much different to my own. I visited an orphanage@single mothers@old folk home in Jinjang with the youths in my area. The home run by a 25 year old man, consists of 30 orphans, 2 single moms together with their infants and a senior citizen. What amazed me was the condition in which they lived in. I still wonder how all of them could fit in that house. It really made me realise how fortunate I am. Being that I am really drawn to kids, so it was hard for me to say goodbye to them.

I also got the chance to visit a shelter for abused girls in Ampang. I guess I really enjoyed my time with them. They were such bubbly, sweet, beautiful girls. It was so great that we all got along so well. And not to mention the fun we had with fabric paint..hehe. I somehow feel like I didnt do much at all, visiting all this places but rather they gave me something to take back with me. They gave me their joy even through the pain, poverty and trials that they may face. And I think a joy like that gives strengh to persevere through the toughest times. Neways....

HAPPY EASTER!!!mwahhss
My classroom boredoms...

What ifs..

What if I talked a little longer,
What if I spoke a little sooner,
..Gazed a little deeper,
Would I find what i need...

What if I could turn back time,
What if nothing changed since,
What if fear didnt hold me back,
Would it change the way things are...

Why cant i forget,
Why cant this go away,
Why does it kill me so much,
Why cant I LET GO!

And what if not knowing wont stop hurting,
What if things have changed,
What if I refuse to believe that,
What if what I need is nothing but a selfish want...
Im only fooling myself....

Update! Update! Update!!!!

Cant believe its already April! Seems like I've gone through extremely mundane days to intensely busy hours in just a few weeks. Not surprising though is the condition of this blog...dead as ever! Practically had to push myself to find time to update it. Seriously, blogging can be difficult at times!

The last few weeks have been pretty hectic, from assignments, outings with friends to planning a surprise b'day party! I guess I shouldnt have complained about having mundane weeks..hehe. Lately, my assignments have been pilling up, one after the other. Best thing is all of the assignments are due around the same time. I wonder who thought of planning it as such :(.

While all the assignments were underway, planning for Shaine's bday was also in progress from getting her *coughs* extra special present to getting all the guys to join in. Somehow through all the mess, we even had time go to Mist, KL. Wonder how that even worked out..hehe. Must have been my 1st time being outside more than inside the place..(sry, u guys).

Through it all, i guess everything turned out well. The bday was great, with great food, great company, and great memories to remember (not forgetting lots of pictures!), assignments all done in time and most of all, the week has been exciting. Owh ya, one last thing..SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING!!!!

All of us at Mist


Shaine's 21st bday!


The whole gang all together...