Dying, slowly but surely

I wonder wheres' my youth gone to? Where my child-like joy has vanished? Year by year I feel it slipping from me and now i'm my worst self; sad, lonely, numb, restless, in tears... I stare at these four walls surrounding me. They edge out like claws; big, monstrous - reaching out, grabbing the very life out of me. The computer screen stares back at me, filled with jargons and data my mind does not know how to decipher. I try to scream but no sound leaves my lips but yet I hear them ringing for they fill every inch of me. People around me go about their very existence, but no ones hears my screams. The screams I so cleverly hide. The irony of it is theres' no where to escape. I'm alone in this...