It's funny how I've never been good enough..even after all these years. I hate myself for trying so hard. Now, I just give up.
p.s. a picture isn't gonna make you any more proud of me. So let's just quit being fake.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Monday, April 11, 2011
Broken...
It's funny how I thought about you just moments ago amidst the hectic schedules, the numerous expectations..with the plectrum in hand. Other than your friendship, I guess I've never told you how grateful I am for this small but significant gift. In many ways, I am completely dependable upon this tiny object though how silly it may sound. I think about the numerous occasions where I've almost lost it, left it behind, lent it and after all this years I still have it very much intact. I think most importantly, it's the remnants of what became of us and how much you used to care - that you believed in my talent way before I even did.
This post, by far seems out of place with my lack of writing and the abandoned state of my blog but really even if I explained the recent events of my life...would you believe me? Sometimes I look back and think, "Is this really happening?". Life just seems so surreal and very much out of my controlling power. I wonder what you would think of me now if you only knew...and I try imagine how you've been all this while and the person you've grown into. But most importantly, I hope your content with life and that it has treated you well.
I hold the plectrum in hand now, as I type these words. I shudder at the thought that I'll never use it again and I'll never have you in mind or feel the same ounce of confidence that little object some how transferred unto me. That's pretty much me being all desperate and very much exaggerating...but yeah, I guess that's how I feel. Perhaps it's a sign that I really have to put this behind for the sake of the both of us.
I think back and even to this day, I think you never truly understood the person that I am. I try to hide my disappointment but I guess I can't blame you for thinking of me so. I wasn't that girl then, and I'm not that girl now...that much hasn't change. I wish you knew that. I had my reasons for my actions and no, I didn't do it because of anyone else.
If I could have one thing back, I yearn for our friendship. More than anything, more that the relationship, more that the distance, that simple F word that you hate, meant the most to me. It's a shame that after all these years, it's the one thing we've withheld from each other. I think we only have ourselves to blame.
Sure you may think regret has got the best of me, or perhaps I'm getting what I deserve but I had reasons for my actions, that much I don't regret. I guess what I really wanted to say is that I miss you..and albeit my silence and non-existence, I've always cared. And though it may be hard for you to accept this, but the one thing I truly fell in love with is our friendship; the late night chats, the silly messages, the lame jokes, the annoying teasing...and just how much we relied on these simplistic gifts to get us through the mess called life.
This post, by far seems out of place with my lack of writing and the abandoned state of my blog but really even if I explained the recent events of my life...would you believe me? Sometimes I look back and think, "Is this really happening?". Life just seems so surreal and very much out of my controlling power. I wonder what you would think of me now if you only knew...and I try imagine how you've been all this while and the person you've grown into. But most importantly, I hope your content with life and that it has treated you well.
I hold the plectrum in hand now, as I type these words. I shudder at the thought that I'll never use it again and I'll never have you in mind or feel the same ounce of confidence that little object some how transferred unto me. That's pretty much me being all desperate and very much exaggerating...but yeah, I guess that's how I feel. Perhaps it's a sign that I really have to put this behind for the sake of the both of us.
I think back and even to this day, I think you never truly understood the person that I am. I try to hide my disappointment but I guess I can't blame you for thinking of me so. I wasn't that girl then, and I'm not that girl now...that much hasn't change. I wish you knew that. I had my reasons for my actions and no, I didn't do it because of anyone else.
If I could have one thing back, I yearn for our friendship. More than anything, more that the relationship, more that the distance, that simple F word that you hate, meant the most to me. It's a shame that after all these years, it's the one thing we've withheld from each other. I think we only have ourselves to blame.
Sure you may think regret has got the best of me, or perhaps I'm getting what I deserve but I had reasons for my actions, that much I don't regret. I guess what I really wanted to say is that I miss you..and albeit my silence and non-existence, I've always cared. And though it may be hard for you to accept this, but the one thing I truly fell in love with is our friendship; the late night chats, the silly messages, the lame jokes, the annoying teasing...and just how much we relied on these simplistic gifts to get us through the mess called life.
I'm sorry for the late posting...I wonder if you noticed
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Of letting go & moving on...
Saw my long, over-the-bra length hair one last time before heading off to the hairdressers. Guess my mind already knew I was getting a few inches off my hair, the next time I take a look at it in the mirror.
Not many people know how troubled I get every time I cut my hair even to the extend of tearing when the hairdresser gets a little too scissor-friendly. Perhaps, it's one of the numerous weird antics I have. But then again, everyone's weird..one way or the other...I'm just pretty obvious most of the time..:s
Small talk aside, I guess even a small, insignificant thing like a hair cut needs some getting used to. But more importantly, whether we like it or not, or perhaps whether we accept it or despise it, sometimes we are left with no choice but to move on. Some things are just out of our control.
I guess I'm finding it difficult to come to terms with how things have turned out, even more so as 2010 comes to a close. Some of which seemed simple, uncomplicated before have clearly turned into the complete opposite. Letting go seems like the only option now. I find myself questioning these circumstances, refusing to give in to the reality. Guess, I'm only fooling myself.
With Christmas close at hand, I hope these next few days away from work and home gives me time to clear my head and make the right decisions. But most of all, help me come to terms with the mess that is year 2010.
So here's me wishing everyone a blessed and joyous Christmas. I hope you'll let Christ find a home in your hearts this 25th.
Btw, presents are more than welcome..Thank you in advance. Muaxx:)
PS: RYMers are having a Christmas party. If you're free on the 26, give Alan a call and come join in the fun!
Not many people know how troubled I get every time I cut my hair even to the extend of tearing when the hairdresser gets a little too scissor-friendly. Perhaps, it's one of the numerous weird antics I have. But then again, everyone's weird..one way or the other...I'm just pretty obvious most of the time..:s
Small talk aside, I guess even a small, insignificant thing like a hair cut needs some getting used to. But more importantly, whether we like it or not, or perhaps whether we accept it or despise it, sometimes we are left with no choice but to move on. Some things are just out of our control.
I guess I'm finding it difficult to come to terms with how things have turned out, even more so as 2010 comes to a close. Some of which seemed simple, uncomplicated before have clearly turned into the complete opposite. Letting go seems like the only option now. I find myself questioning these circumstances, refusing to give in to the reality. Guess, I'm only fooling myself.
With Christmas close at hand, I hope these next few days away from work and home gives me time to clear my head and make the right decisions. But most of all, help me come to terms with the mess that is year 2010.
So here's me wishing everyone a blessed and joyous Christmas. I hope you'll let Christ find a home in your hearts this 25th.
Btw, presents are more than welcome..Thank you in advance. Muaxx:)
PS: RYMers are having a Christmas party. If you're free on the 26, give Alan a call and come join in the fun!
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Acceptance...
I wonder if anyone else shares this same feeling I get every time I'm back from a church camp. This beaming, 'nothing can bring me down' feeling. It's as if your defenses are at its highest. If I were a spaceship, you could say my shields would be impenetrable, my force fields would be so strong that radiation from the sun, cosmic rays or even the typical black hole would be nothing compared to it. But of course, I would have to be in Star Trek in order for this to be possible...hehe.
I guess what I'm saying is camps have this profound effect on me. You spend the weekend away from the world, away from worries, away from your routine life. It's amazing how being away from life makes all the difference. How suddenly life seems manageable, how problems you thought were big seem insignificant and small and how much more in tune you are with yourself.
I've been to so many camps in the past...I guess I should rephrase that..I'm fortunate to have had the opportunity. There's always something different that I take back from each. This time I guess camp opened my eyes to struggles I carried but of which I never took time to acknowledge. Perhaps in my eyes I saw them as insignificant or rather I thought ignoring them would help make the burden lighter. I guess that didn't work.
I would normally just brush them aside. In my eyes, how can someone who has no severe health problems, no deformities, no huge family issues, financially stable, normal in most ways call this little worries - problems. I look at Nick Vujicic and I tear wondering what the hell is wrong with me. He may be disabled, incapable of so many things but as a person he is so much more capable, perhaps even more whole than I am. I admire his confidence and his joy for life.
I guess the most significant struggle I face is acceptance. Accepting ones self. It's probably one I've been struggling with for almost as long as I can remember. Gosh, this blog is getting too personal..hehe. It's funny but sometimes I pray to be normal just like everyone else. Perhaps have an average sense of confidence, or even act like most others or may be not stumble in my words every now and then. I feel silly now looking back. What is normal anyways?
Camp enlightened me to my own faults but mostly the thought of 'Am I doing enough?'. This is not one of those,"What am I leaving behind in this world?" or "Owh, what would people say about me when I'm dead?". No, no..hehe. I would be happy to die without a eulogy. I'm glad my family doesn't practice it. But I guess it's a personal thought.
Am I doing enough as a child?
Do I appreciate my family enough? Have I let my parents down?
Am I doing enough for my friends?
Do I genuinely care? Have I been there for them?
Am I doing enough at work?
Have I put in enough effort? Have I put in any thought to moving forward in work?
Am I putting in enough in my faith?
Have I really put my whole body and soul to search for God? Do I really know my faith well? or do I wait for others to question me and tear me down when I can't stand up for it?
Am I doing enough in life? Am I?
No. Disappointing much but true. I don't really know where to start in mending all these areas. I don't even know if I can. I guess the first step is accepting me. I know I'm going to most definitely fail..but for You, I'll try. I'll try.
I guess what I'm saying is camps have this profound effect on me. You spend the weekend away from the world, away from worries, away from your routine life. It's amazing how being away from life makes all the difference. How suddenly life seems manageable, how problems you thought were big seem insignificant and small and how much more in tune you are with yourself.
I've been to so many camps in the past...I guess I should rephrase that..I'm fortunate to have had the opportunity. There's always something different that I take back from each. This time I guess camp opened my eyes to struggles I carried but of which I never took time to acknowledge. Perhaps in my eyes I saw them as insignificant or rather I thought ignoring them would help make the burden lighter. I guess that didn't work.
I would normally just brush them aside. In my eyes, how can someone who has no severe health problems, no deformities, no huge family issues, financially stable, normal in most ways call this little worries - problems. I look at Nick Vujicic and I tear wondering what the hell is wrong with me. He may be disabled, incapable of so many things but as a person he is so much more capable, perhaps even more whole than I am. I admire his confidence and his joy for life.
I guess the most significant struggle I face is acceptance. Accepting ones self. It's probably one I've been struggling with for almost as long as I can remember. Gosh, this blog is getting too personal..hehe. It's funny but sometimes I pray to be normal just like everyone else. Perhaps have an average sense of confidence, or even act like most others or may be not stumble in my words every now and then. I feel silly now looking back. What is normal anyways?
Camp enlightened me to my own faults but mostly the thought of 'Am I doing enough?'. This is not one of those,"What am I leaving behind in this world?" or "Owh, what would people say about me when I'm dead?". No, no..hehe. I would be happy to die without a eulogy. I'm glad my family doesn't practice it. But I guess it's a personal thought.
Am I doing enough as a child?
Do I appreciate my family enough? Have I let my parents down?
Am I doing enough for my friends?
Do I genuinely care? Have I been there for them?
Am I doing enough at work?
Have I put in enough effort? Have I put in any thought to moving forward in work?
Am I putting in enough in my faith?
Have I really put my whole body and soul to search for God? Do I really know my faith well? or do I wait for others to question me and tear me down when I can't stand up for it?
Am I doing enough in life? Am I?
No. Disappointing much but true. I don't really know where to start in mending all these areas. I don't even know if I can. I guess the first step is accepting me. I know I'm going to most definitely fail..but for You, I'll try. I'll try.
Failure is not important, how you overcome it is...
Nick Vujicic
Nick Vujicic
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Where do we go from here....
Listening to: The Scientist - Coldplay
Left the blog vacant for a bit..again. Sigh, I guess life really takes a toll on you. I guess I can't say I haven't had much time in front of the computer, but rather I've had plenty. I can't also say I've been busy with work because lately work has been treating me well. The only excuse I can put together is that I've been so utterly lazy. Then again who isn't.
I recently watched an episode of One Tree Hill..Yes, the show is still on for the eight season. Episode 8.08 kinda put this question to me, "What comes next?". And it seriously got me thinking..Shit, I don't have an answer to that.
I'm past being a teenager, I'm done with my studies, I've got a job..so what comes next? Where am I heading towards? Where do I see myself in the future? I guess it's not surprising that I don't have the answer to either one of these questions.
I've heard so many comments from friends, lamenting about how hard studying is, how stressful assignments can get, how exams are just about the worst thing one can go through..but I can't help but be envious. I might sound silly, but I like being a student. I like knowing that I've got time to figure things out. That I can work harder the next time, or do things differently every time I fail.
I guess when you're out there in the world, life hardly gives you second chances or perhaps 'trial rounds'. You are judged as soon as you make the tiniest of mistakes or if you don't perform up to the given standard. And somehow your failure will be what most will expect of you in the future. It's scary and nerve-recking all at the same time.
Same goes for relationships. At first everything looks hopeful, things are simple and uncomplicated but after awhile the honeymoon is over and the real relationship surfaces - the problems of dealing with one another, tolerating each others' wants and needs, coming to terms with decisions each one has made...coping with regrets and past actions. Before you know it your view of your partner changes and vice versa. At first you don't notice this but sooner or later, changes become evident. Suddenly you find yourself hating qualities you first fell in love with in that person. It's sad but so true.
So what comes next?
What comes next when you don't see a future?
What comes next if you've discovered the limit to your talent?
What comes next when you have to move on and let him go?
What comes next when relationships, when friendship isn't fulfilling?
What is your next move? I guess we fickle-minded, complicated mortals just have to move on. Pick ourselves up and just hope for the best. That what ever choice we should decide to make will eventually lead to a better, more secure outcome. That what ever relationships we let go of, will eventually lead to newer and closer ties with others. That what ever love we lose, we earn back..stronger and lasting. Well that's what I hope for as November comes to an end and I have one more month left before 2010 closes on me. And I hope for my sake, I find the answers to these questions...
Left the blog vacant for a bit..again. Sigh, I guess life really takes a toll on you. I guess I can't say I haven't had much time in front of the computer, but rather I've had plenty. I can't also say I've been busy with work because lately work has been treating me well. The only excuse I can put together is that I've been so utterly lazy. Then again who isn't.
I recently watched an episode of One Tree Hill..Yes, the show is still on for the eight season. Episode 8.08 kinda put this question to me, "What comes next?". And it seriously got me thinking..Shit, I don't have an answer to that.
I'm past being a teenager, I'm done with my studies, I've got a job..so what comes next? Where am I heading towards? Where do I see myself in the future? I guess it's not surprising that I don't have the answer to either one of these questions.
I've heard so many comments from friends, lamenting about how hard studying is, how stressful assignments can get, how exams are just about the worst thing one can go through..but I can't help but be envious. I might sound silly, but I like being a student. I like knowing that I've got time to figure things out. That I can work harder the next time, or do things differently every time I fail.
I guess when you're out there in the world, life hardly gives you second chances or perhaps 'trial rounds'. You are judged as soon as you make the tiniest of mistakes or if you don't perform up to the given standard. And somehow your failure will be what most will expect of you in the future. It's scary and nerve-recking all at the same time.
Same goes for relationships. At first everything looks hopeful, things are simple and uncomplicated but after awhile the honeymoon is over and the real relationship surfaces - the problems of dealing with one another, tolerating each others' wants and needs, coming to terms with decisions each one has made...coping with regrets and past actions. Before you know it your view of your partner changes and vice versa. At first you don't notice this but sooner or later, changes become evident. Suddenly you find yourself hating qualities you first fell in love with in that person. It's sad but so true.
So what comes next?
What comes next when you don't see a future?
What comes next if you've discovered the limit to your talent?
What comes next when you have to move on and let him go?
What comes next when relationships, when friendship isn't fulfilling?
What is your next move? I guess we fickle-minded, complicated mortals just have to move on. Pick ourselves up and just hope for the best. That what ever choice we should decide to make will eventually lead to a better, more secure outcome. That what ever relationships we let go of, will eventually lead to newer and closer ties with others. That what ever love we lose, we earn back..stronger and lasting. Well that's what I hope for as November comes to an end and I have one more month left before 2010 closes on me. And I hope for my sake, I find the answers to these questions...
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Introducing...Midnight Revolution
I suppose everyone has a list of things they plan to do or achieve before they leave earth. Some of us have even had the list planned out since we were kids, even took the time to jot it down on paper and save it so as to check on it from time to time. For some of us, we're made mental notes, our personal list of aspirations and dreams, frequently changing as we progress with age. And for some of us, well we've thought about making that list...but perhaps never really sat down to think it through. I guess I fall into the second category - the semi-lazy category I suppose..hehe
You see I've always had the urge to push myself to do something I know I would never do. It used to be easier to trick myself into doing these things when I was a kid but now that I'm much older I try my best to stay on the safe side - do the norm & avoid taking risks. But I guess I've always had this need to prove that I could do it one day..just didn't know that one day would come so soon.
I guess this thing I'm talking about is performing..and not just playing the guitar, I think that wouldn't be much of a challenge but really performing with the whole band scenario, instruments and actually daring to face an audience with my amateur, timid voice. Lucky for me, the perfect opportunity arose and I still can't imagine why I said yes without much hesitation. I do think I freaked out a little everyday. Facing a crowd of 500 people including my parents, students and closest friends is nerve-recking. I guess I felt more sympathetic for them because they were forced to hear my voice whether they liked it or not...hehe.
My bandmates were great. Alan; who first pulled me in, really got his act together which to most of us can seem pretty surprising..knowing Alan. We had so many practices that we hardly had any jitters as our performance day got close. And Devon..well his voice pretty much says it all..He practically carried the band when it came to our vocals. I love his harmonizing..(i'm so jealous) I dare say this guy is going far with his talent.
For a whole week, we got really serious. We practiced till our hands were sore, voices were strained, we had the lyrics almost memorized..hehe but what we didn't have was a name. You could imagine all the silly, corny names we came up with..Alan keep insisting on 'sweet Bejibies'..which thank God was not a name we settled for. In the end, Devon saved us with 'Midnight Revolution', pretty cool name...though I don't know if there's a meaning to it. Perhaps it has something to do with RYM & practicing till midnight? lol. Well, it's definitely better than 'Sweet Bejibies'.:P
Performance day came and we didn't suck too bad...lol. My parents were pretty syched that I was actually stepping up and doing something I normally wouldn't. In their own, weird way..I'm grateful and touched by their support. I must say, I have really awesome friends..they calmed my fears and cheered us on. Not too mention their families too. I'm very touched.
I've attached the vids courtesy of Devon below. This is another thing I wouldn't usually do and trust me, i tried to talk myself out of this. But I think this is the best place to share my work, with people who care about me the most. Just note that, I cringed every time I heard my voice....it was shaky, pitchy and yes..I played way too fast..lol.
3.09, Did you notice the look Devon & Alan gave each other! I wonder what they were thinking.. *Slaps self for not smiling at all!*
Think it's about time I put myself out there. I hope that was a little entertaining. Thanks for listening. Muaxx. Forehead, CSD & chayang..next performance is ours!
You see I've always had the urge to push myself to do something I know I would never do. It used to be easier to trick myself into doing these things when I was a kid but now that I'm much older I try my best to stay on the safe side - do the norm & avoid taking risks. But I guess I've always had this need to prove that I could do it one day..just didn't know that one day would come so soon.
I guess this thing I'm talking about is performing..and not just playing the guitar, I think that wouldn't be much of a challenge but really performing with the whole band scenario, instruments and actually daring to face an audience with my amateur, timid voice. Lucky for me, the perfect opportunity arose and I still can't imagine why I said yes without much hesitation. I do think I freaked out a little everyday. Facing a crowd of 500 people including my parents, students and closest friends is nerve-recking. I guess I felt more sympathetic for them because they were forced to hear my voice whether they liked it or not...hehe.
My bandmates were great. Alan; who first pulled me in, really got his act together which to most of us can seem pretty surprising..knowing Alan. We had so many practices that we hardly had any jitters as our performance day got close. And Devon..well his voice pretty much says it all..He practically carried the band when it came to our vocals. I love his harmonizing..(i'm so jealous) I dare say this guy is going far with his talent.
For a whole week, we got really serious. We practiced till our hands were sore, voices were strained, we had the lyrics almost memorized..hehe but what we didn't have was a name. You could imagine all the silly, corny names we came up with..Alan keep insisting on 'sweet Bejibies'..which thank God was not a name we settled for. In the end, Devon saved us with 'Midnight Revolution', pretty cool name...though I don't know if there's a meaning to it. Perhaps it has something to do with RYM & practicing till midnight? lol. Well, it's definitely better than 'Sweet Bejibies'.:P
Performance day came and we didn't suck too bad...lol. My parents were pretty syched that I was actually stepping up and doing something I normally wouldn't. In their own, weird way..I'm grateful and touched by their support. I must say, I have really awesome friends..they calmed my fears and cheered us on. Not too mention their families too. I'm very touched.
I've attached the vids courtesy of Devon below. This is another thing I wouldn't usually do and trust me, i tried to talk myself out of this. But I think this is the best place to share my work, with people who care about me the most. Just note that, I cringed every time I heard my voice....it was shaky, pitchy and yes..I played way too fast..lol.
3.09, Did you notice the look Devon & Alan gave each other! I wonder what they were thinking.. *Slaps self for not smiling at all!*
Think it's about time I put myself out there. I hope that was a little entertaining. Thanks for listening. Muaxx. Forehead, CSD & chayang..next performance is ours!
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Going the distance
Been awhile since I paid a visit to the cinema. In truth there haven't been any good shows worth watching after 'Inception' (*reminds self to get the DVD). So for the fun of it, I decided to give in and watch 'Going the distance' (after constant ranting from my sis).
The chick-flick come romance comedy proved to be not bad after all. It didn't hurt that Justin Long was acting in it and I do love geeky, smart, funny guys..How can you not love a guy clad in converse & checks...ahhh.
I should probably mention if you didn't already know, the movie revolves around a long distance relationship and all that fuss that comes with it. Seems like an all too familiar situation for me.
One thing's for sure, long distance relationships are never easy. You spend a lot on phone bills, traveling costs and not to mention have to adjust accordingly to the time difference. But most importantly, you spend most of the time apart missing one another instead of building on that relationship.
From time to time you get that rare opportunity to be together, spend those few days in each others company. That time together is both wonderful whereas on the other hand it leaves you anxious. Perhaps, it's just me but meeting someone you love after a long time apart leaves you wondering whether either one of you have changed from the last time you met. Whether things will just fall back to place like no one ever left the other. For a person who over thinks everything, I guess I thought about it a lot.
But more than missing your other half, or having to spend a good amount of money just to keep the relationship going..having to say goodbye over and over again is what hurts the most. Knowing that neither one of you can stay with the other indefinitely is frustrating. You meet this great person, spend a short time together then have to be prepared to let them go again and again.
In the end, is it worth it? Truthfully, I can't say. I guess it really depends on the individual and on the relationship itself. But perhaps what I can attest to is never to begin a relationship being separated from each other. That is no way to start a foundation.
Long distance relationships aside, the movie was really good. Kept me laughing and kept my friends teary-eyed (not to mention tightly snugged to their other halfs). Did I mention I was yet again 'tianged'...the gf left me to hang out with some guy..pfff. I dare say, I kept my eyes focused on the screen and the screen alone..if you know what I mean..hehe.
The chick-flick come romance comedy proved to be not bad after all. It didn't hurt that Justin Long was acting in it and I do love geeky, smart, funny guys..How can you not love a guy clad in converse & checks...ahhh.
I should probably mention if you didn't already know, the movie revolves around a long distance relationship and all that fuss that comes with it. Seems like an all too familiar situation for me.
One thing's for sure, long distance relationships are never easy. You spend a lot on phone bills, traveling costs and not to mention have to adjust accordingly to the time difference. But most importantly, you spend most of the time apart missing one another instead of building on that relationship.
From time to time you get that rare opportunity to be together, spend those few days in each others company. That time together is both wonderful whereas on the other hand it leaves you anxious. Perhaps, it's just me but meeting someone you love after a long time apart leaves you wondering whether either one of you have changed from the last time you met. Whether things will just fall back to place like no one ever left the other. For a person who over thinks everything, I guess I thought about it a lot.
But more than missing your other half, or having to spend a good amount of money just to keep the relationship going..having to say goodbye over and over again is what hurts the most. Knowing that neither one of you can stay with the other indefinitely is frustrating. You meet this great person, spend a short time together then have to be prepared to let them go again and again.
In the end, is it worth it? Truthfully, I can't say. I guess it really depends on the individual and on the relationship itself. But perhaps what I can attest to is never to begin a relationship being separated from each other. That is no way to start a foundation.
Long distance relationships aside, the movie was really good. Kept me laughing and kept my friends teary-eyed (not to mention tightly snugged to their other halfs). Did I mention I was yet again 'tianged'...the gf left me to hang out with some guy..pfff. I dare say, I kept my eyes focused on the screen and the screen alone..if you know what I mean..hehe.
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